It’s true. Just about every year for the past however-many years, my resolution has been “be aware of your posture” or “sit up straighter.” Yet here I sit, hunched over like some kind of monster, furiously tapping away, illuminated by sickly computer light.
I’ve always known that I suck at resolutions, which is why in more recent years, I resolved to stop making them. What I should do is practice some follow-through or self-discipline, but let’s be real here. What I’m going to do is go home from work and sit on my couch and binge-watch Netflix or watch my husband play Rocket League for hours, so I need to be living my truth. (Sidebar: maybe I should work on getting a better truth? Can’t my truth be that I’m an independently wealthy socialite who doesn’t actually socialize, like, ever?)
It would be really easy to say “I’m going to get my shit together in 2016” and it would be really easy to not follow through on that statement. So, instead of harping on things I should (and won’t) do, I’d like to take a cue from Denise D.T., head badass over at Lucky Bitch.
Denise suggests in lieu of making a list of things you’re going to do in the coming year, you should instead create a list of things you successfully did in the past year. You’re supposed to trade off with a partner – someone you trust and who “gets” you. She says you have to keep going until you have 50 things. If you get stuck, your partner has to ask, “What else?”. As an example, here are a few of mine.
- I survived a tough pregnancy with 9 straight months of “morning” (aka all day, every day) sickness.
- I delivered a healthy baby! (I guess that made the sickness “worth it”???)
- I learned to edit myself – online, and in person. I practiced more tact, more thinking before speaking, and more listening before talking.
- I stopped reading all those spam/promotional emails and stopped letting the 3K “unread” notifications bother me.
- I cut out some people who were sucking up all of my energy and happiness.
- I took some classes online and in person about management and leadership.
- I helped interview and hire some fantastic people for my department.
- I wrote more for myself and for a newsletter that interested me. (Not everything I wrote got published – for instance, I started this draft 12/31/15 and just came back to it – but it got done on my own time! That’s an accomplishment, too.)
- I learned to better manage my stress, and in turn, have less stress in my life.
- I decided on some things I wanted, and then went out and got them. (This includes both physical and non-physical things.)
Compiling a list of 50 things may seem daunting, but I’ve already listed 10 of my own, and if before I started working on this you asked me, “Have you done 10 things you’re proud of?” I might not have thought that I did. So, I encourage you to give this a try, if you’d like to. I’m trying to adopt a better mantra than “new year, new me.” I’ve yet to decide what that is, but I guess you can come up with your own and then add it to your list at the end of the year ;) In the coming year, I’m hoping to make sure I take a little time for myself in between working full time and being a mom. I hope to decorate my house a little more to my style (and on a budget!), write a little more frequently, and complete some costumes so that I can volunteer my time with two clubs, the 501st Legion and Rebel Legion.
Here’s to you. I hope you recognize your own accomplishments from the past year for whatever they are, and that you’re motivated to continue achieving in the year to come. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to set goals you’re going to fail at – focus on a few things you’d like to do or improve, and just keep on truckin’.